Search

Fleet Life with Ed Miller: Daish's Fleet need to find a killer instinct

PUBLISHED: 17:27 09 September 2009 | UPDATED: 11:04 23 August 2010

WHILE it may not quite have been men against boys last Saturday, one could argue a case for Neanderthals versus Homo sapiens. Big and ugly, Oxford made the most of their physical advantages and in Mark Creighton - the nearest thing to a Terminator in sho

WHILE it may not quite have been men against boys last Saturday, one could argue a case for Neanderthals versus Homo sapiens.

Big and ugly, Oxford made the most of their physical advantages and in Mark Creighton - the nearest thing to a Terminator in shorts - have perhaps the scariest specimen to ever take the field at Stonebridge Road.

Standing six-foot four with a skull like a battering ram, he even appeared to have bits missing from his hair, which is presumably where they unscrew his head to pour in the nails and rivets he feasts on as a pre-match meal.

The somewhat disturbing body art was something else - and, in fact, all of their defenders seemed to be sporting 'decorative' tattoos as if some kind of Viking-style initiation ceremony is now in place before signing for Oxford.

Then, there was his bizarre method of communication - consisting mainly of snarls and roars that I'm sure I've only ever seen lions at Howlett's use to speak to one another.

No wonder our forwards got little change out of him... Simon Thomas would have been better waving lumps of flesh under his nose than trying to outmuscle and outjump him.

At the other end of the field was James Constable, whose permanent scowl and malevolent squint would certainly not be considered a work of art by his namesake.

And in between Matt Green, a man who surely possessed more than two elbows, such was the enthusiasm with which he poked them into Jordan Collins' face all afternoon.

But, all of these rather futile observations on my part cannot hide the fact that the Fleet still have mountains to climb to compete with the top sides - hardly surprising given the resources the likes of Oxford can command with crowds on average five or six times ours every week.

Physically, our young side were second best - perfectly understandable in the circumstances - and, while we more than matched Oxford for half an hour, as I mentioned last week, the errors are costing us games and we can ill afford to give teams headstarts in this way.

Yet, Oxford were clearly championship material and a 2-0 reverse is hardly demoralising - many had predicted it, but the quickfire manner in which it came about was the disappointing aspect.

Certainly, more experienced Fleet team down the years have been even more comprehensively beaten by the top clubs, so there's no need to wail and gnash our teeth just yet. Points from these matches are going to be a bonus this season and, while that doesn't mean we should go into them expecting to pick up the square root of nothing at all, it does mean that fixtures against the lowest 10 or so outfits are where we really need to tighten up.

Writing before Rushden, they are certainly one of those we could nick three points from, their thrashing of Barrow last week notwithstanding.

That said, however, I do think we need to set aside some funds to build our own Terminator in the style of Mark Creighton to put the fear of God into opponents.

Come on Liam, I think it's time you signed a big, ugly brute with a metal head, don't you?

Most Read

Most Read

Latest from the Gravesend Reporter

Hot Jobs

Show Job Lists